God, I need you…

… so much.

You have given. You have… taken.
It’s all part of your plan, yes?

I am so very afraid. Your future, it scares me.

You know my thoughts, you see my imagination.
And you see the paths it takes me to.
Paths that, a lot of the time, don’t lead to you.

My desire is to please you, my Lord.
And I cry, uncontrollably, when you take things away.
When you take.. people.. away.

But……… you are.

You are my lesson.
You are my future.
You are my daddy.
You are… in control……

….right?

I will obey. I will be okay.

I am… glad, that you know how it feels.
I… love, how you know my struggle.

It’s… amazing, that I can turn to you.
Proof that you are real.
That your reality.. can be mine.
Love.

I did not expect this change. Yet, through its mouth came the wisdom that has prepared me such.

Fitting.

I’ll keep holding on. Through tears. And joy.
May what I feel be allowed by you.
Shape me. Tolerate my pain and my whining.

And… most importantly… just… stay with me.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s